I'm Learning

I drink whiskey. Rye to be specific. Crown Royal if I'm on your Christmas list. Of course depending on where I'm at; a beer is just fine too.

Australian men drink beer. Not a lot of wine drinkers here amongst the male set. Not that there isn't a lot of wine here, there is and I'm sure that men do buy wine and perhaps even taste it over dinner at home but once out on the town it's a Pure Blond over Pinot Noir for sure.

I've noticed Australian guys don't whine (or whinge as they say here). They don't sit around complaining about taxes or the government and they don't fret over the weather. Canadian men whine about everything; it is in fact a Canadian tradition. Also an alarming trend over my last decade in Canada was the number of men that would primp and preen in the public restrooms. There was more of a lineup at the sink than at the toilets waiting for some Canadian guy to make sure the gel was holding. Egad. Australian guys don't primp. Another thing that Australian guys don't do is shower. I've been working out at the gym the past few weeks and I'm the only one that I know of to actually use the shower. I could put it down to a severe water saving plan brought on by years of drought conditions but actually I don't think that's it. They just don't bother. If you see a couple out on a date in downtown Australia it isn't unusual to a see a woman who has definitely made an effort for the evening holding hands with some bloke wearing a decade old Collingwood Magpie jersey, that looks like it's just been pulled out of a gym bag. I'm not sure how these guys get away with it but more power to them I suppose. I think that there is an unwritten rule in Canada that men over the age of 13 cannot wear sports team wear in public - this law apparently was not instituted down under.

This isn't the first time that I've made such observations and in fact I have been canvassing a certain number of female acquaintances around Canberra and Sydney to ask them about their seemingly low standards or perhaps high tolerance for slovenly behaviour. I ask them what they would think of a guy that showered, used aftershave, made sure that their shirt had a collar and perhaps ran an iron over the ensemble before heading out for the evening. The consensus seems to be amongst the fairer sex in Australia that such behaviour could only mean one thing - gay!

By the way can anyone send me my old Toronto Argonaut Jersey from when I was 12 - I think I'll need it.